title

Savage Lovecast

Dan Savage

983
Followers
3.5K
Plays
Savage Lovecast

Savage Lovecast

Dan Savage

983
Followers
3.5K
Plays
OVERVIEWEPISODESYOU MAY ALSO LIKE

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About Us

Dan Savage, America's only advice columnist, answers your sex questions and yaps about politics. To record a question for Dan to be answered in a later podcast, call 206-302-2064. For a much longer version of the show, with no ads, visit savagelovecast.com and get yourself a season subscription.

Latest Episodes

Monogamy is looking pretty good!

EJust when you thought you understood the world, Dan chats with open relationships guru Tristan Taormino, to tell you to CLOSE IT UP. Monogamy is where it's at these days. Just for a while. A woman in a long distance relationship is trying to embrace video sex. But she worries that she doesn't look sexy when she's truly pleasuring herself. How can she learn to do the "performance" of video sex, and still get off? On the Magnum, Dan calls up Searah Deysach from the feminist sex-toy store Early to Bed, to talk about "sleeves." What are they? What are those bumps? Where can I get me one? And, a lesbian decided not to respond to a trans woman on a dating app. Does this make her a transphobic monster? 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com This podcast is brought to you by . Click on the microphone and enter "Savage" for postage, a digital scale, and a 4 week trial. This episode is brought to you by Doordash. Get breakfast, lunch, dinner and more delivered from your favorite restaurants right to your doorstep with one easy click. Get $5 off your first order of $15 or more when you download the DoorDash app and enter promo code SAVAGE. ThredUP is the world’s largest online thrift store with over 35,000 brands at up to 90% off retail price. For a limited time, get up to 30% off your first order at .

53 MIN1 d ago
Comments
Monogamy is looking pretty good!

Paging Dr. Bummer...

EThis week, Dan's guest is epidemiologist Daniel Westreich, who spells out the concept of physical distancing, and why sexual intimacy is going to be pretty difficult to attain for many of us. Some of the conversation is on the Micro, and all of it is on the Magnum. A man asks if virtual reality porn makes sense to help "spice up your sex life." Why yes, it makes A LOT of sense right now. A woman who is engaged to be married to her boyfriend has a female friend. This friend made a drunken, predatory pass at her. Can/should she forgive and try to salvage the friendship? And, saddle up for this weird ride: A man is married to his wife. Cool, cool. They have an open relationship. No prob. She has a boyfriend. Nice. She lives with her boyfriend. Ok? He is not allowed to seek outside partners. Wait- what? Also, his wife's boyfriend forbids her from having sex with the caller, her husband. Soooooo. The caller needs a little chat from Dan Savage. Ring ring! 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelove...

48 MIN1 w ago
Comments
Paging Dr. Bummer...

Will You Be My Quarantine?

EHere at Savage Lovecast world headquarters, in the heart of the epicenter of the Big Sick, we are keeping calm and carrying on, baby! Dan chats with Dr. Jen Gunter, who had to practice social distancing for ONE YEAR, so quit griping. She offers some strategies for how to deal with your new isolation. And, Dr.Debby Herbenick explains that although the corona virus is not sexually transmitted, you still can't just be mashing with anyone safely these days. Uh doy! Hear the tale of Maya, stuck in Spain and wondering if her relationship is mature enough to endure the rigors of quarantine. And, taking a breather, (as it were) from all this virus talk, Dan speaks with Brian Earp, author of Love Drugs: The Chemical Future of Relationships. The tech-savvy at-risk youth are poised to accept this chemical future. 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com This episode of the Savage love cast is brought to you by Everlane: Luxury basic clothing and accessories, made at ethical factories without ...

61 MIN2 w ago
Comments
Will You Be My Quarantine?

What about the gay penguins?

ESometimes people call us when they're drunk. Sometimes they call us about their dogs. Welcome to the center of this Venn diagram. A woman has been invited to a "costume wedding." She will be required to dress up like a character in a movie. Is this asking too much? On the Magnum version of the show, it's a super-weird "What You Got?" with an evolutionary reproductive biologist who mulls over the *possibility* that the animal kingdom is teeming with same-sex behavior. Not just the homo penguins. And, a young woman is turned on by much older men. How can she score a silver fox without looking like gold digger? 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com Thanks to Roman for supporting Savage Lovecast. Roman is a men’s health company that offers remote online diagnosis for ED and convenient monthly delivery of medication. For a free online, visit This episode is brought to you by Doordash. Get breakfast, lunch, dinner and more delivered from your favorite restaurants right to your doorst...

47 MIN3 w ago
Comments
What about the gay penguins?

With Cameron Esposito!

EA gay man was hooking up at a bathhouse. His brand new lover wanted to bring a little romance into the encounter by saying the caller's name and complimenting him. The caller was horrified. Isn't bathhouse sex supposed to be anonymous? Meanwhile, in another corner of our universe, a woman is appalled that her boyfriend closes his eyes when they're having sex. How can she get him to gaze deeply into her soul while pounding her real good? On the Magnum version of the show, Dan chats with stand-up comedian, and podcaster Cameron Esposito about her new book: Save Yourself, and how queerness and the experience of being closeted impacts her comedy. Finally, a married man with a one year-old child bemoans the quality of the "service sex" he's getting these days. With he ever see the return of enthusiastic rutting? 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at and if you want to buy i...

46 MINMAR. 3
Comments
With Cameron Esposito!

All about WEED with Lester Black.

EA straight man was dating a woman, and it felt great. Until she gave him the "I'm not ready for a relationship" line. Is this always a lie? What does it mean? Dan spells it out, with no sugar on top. A man is worried about his new girlfriend. You see, she has never had penetrative sex. Is he special enough to be her first? On the Micro and more on the Magnum, Dan chats with weed journalist (now there's a sweet job if ever we've heard of one,) Lester Black. They talk about a woman whose smart husband turns into a drooling dullard whilst blazed, smoking when you're pregnant, and the effects of marijuana on dick size. Can you resist this show? No, you cannot. A man on the frozen tundra hasn't had sex in 3 years because he claims to be a grower, not a shower. Women reject him because of his dick size (he thinks) and then reject him further when he fails to eat them out properly. But he wants to learn! He asks his female friends if he can practice on them, but strangely, they all say "no...

50 MINFEB. 25
Comments
All about WEED with Lester Black.

The TRUTH about women's libido with Dr. Wednesday Martin.

EA man is going through a divorce from his wife of 7 years. Although their breakup was peaceful, now her communication is curt and unfriendly. Is he entitled to feel angry about her unwarranted coldness? A man kindly lent a friend some money. Now she keeps asking him for more and more every month! Should he just set her up with a regular payment, or cut off the friendship? On the Micro and the Magnum version of the show, Dan chats with Dr. Wednesday Martin, author of Untrue, about women's libido, how it really works, and how our culture's misunderstanding harms relationships. A group of folks were disparaging "outie vaginas" at a party. One of the women there got awfully quiet. Did they offend her? Is this the equivalent of making fun of itsy-bitsy, teeny-tiny penises? 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com This episode is brought to you by Talkspace- online therapy that makes it easy to get extra mental health support. For $100 off your first month, go to and use the offer code S...

51 MINFEB. 18
Comments
The TRUTH about women's libido with Dr. Wednesday Martin.

Spanking is for grownups. With Jillian Keenan.

EA young man has been dating a woman for a short time. She seems great...except. Except she is anti-abortion, and anti-gay in a lazy, not very heartfelt sort of way. Can he use his sex powers to change her feeble mind? Meanwhile, a woman is dating a guy also for a short time. He told her that if he got her pregnant, he would insist that she keep the child instead of have an abortion. Should she, maybe, dump him immediately? On the Magnum, Dan chats with the writer Jillian Keenan about spanking: It's for grown-ups only please. They discuss the origins of a spanking fetish and whether corporal punishment as a child seeps into an adult's erotic imagination. A married man with a religious upbringing feels shame and guilt about masturbating. His wife contributes to this mindset. His marriage is sexless and even his urologist agrees that he needs to ejaculate already. How can he learn to wank with pride? Shame and guilt. Keeping us in business since 2006. 206-302-2064 or This episode is br...

48 MINFEB. 11
Comments
Spanking is for grownups. With Jillian Keenan.

With the brililant Peggy Orenstein.

EA woman is hoping to find a monogamous partner who is also kinky. But when she puts the word "kinky" in her profile she gets flooded with ridiculous pervs. How can she filter out the clueless horndogs? Hear the very unpleasant tale of a gay couple who venture to an older man's apartment for a hook-up, only to find there were many more men there than promised. Why was this gentleman so dishonest? Aren't older men supposed to be supportive mentors for up and coming young 'mos? On the Magnum, Dan speaks with super-duper smart writer Peggy Orenstein, (author of Girls and Sex) about her new book- Boys and Sex. She and Dan discuss how boys both suffer from and then perpetuate the culture of toxic masculinity. If you have a kid with a penis, you should listen to this one. A man is ordained to marry people through one of those mail-in certificates. His sister has asked him to perform her marriage ceremony. But her fiancé is a lying, coke addled, no-good drunk! How can he bless this mess? 2...

46 MINFEB. 4
Comments
With the brililant Peggy Orenstein.

Happy poly homes with Dr. Elisabeth Sheff.

EHave you ever experienced conflict during a family vacation? The first call on this show might put it all in perspective for you. A protective big sister can't stand that her 17 year-old sis is dating a 21 year-old man. Their parents don't mind. Should big sister give the guy a chance, or is the age difference unacceptable? On the Magnum, Dan chats with Dr. Elizabeth Sheff from Psychology Today about raising children within a polyamorous household. And finally, a woman is considering becoming a fin-dom, with the power to financially ruin her client. But she doesn't want to ruin anyone. Is there a way to ethically do this? 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com The Savage Lovecast is brought to you by Dame Products: a woman-founded sex toy company. Visit to check out Eva- the hands-free vibrator. Today’s Lovecast is brought to you by MeUndies.com: High quality, super-comfortable, good looking undies. Get 15% off your first order when you go to . This episode is brought to you by ...

51 MINENE. 28
Comments
Happy poly homes with Dr. Elisabeth Sheff.

Latest Episodes

Monogamy is looking pretty good!

EJust when you thought you understood the world, Dan chats with open relationships guru Tristan Taormino, to tell you to CLOSE IT UP. Monogamy is where it's at these days. Just for a while. A woman in a long distance relationship is trying to embrace video sex. But she worries that she doesn't look sexy when she's truly pleasuring herself. How can she learn to do the "performance" of video sex, and still get off? On the Magnum, Dan calls up Searah Deysach from the feminist sex-toy store Early to Bed, to talk about "sleeves." What are they? What are those bumps? Where can I get me one? And, a lesbian decided not to respond to a trans woman on a dating app. Does this make her a transphobic monster? 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com This podcast is brought to you by . Click on the microphone and enter "Savage" for postage, a digital scale, and a 4 week trial. This episode is brought to you by Doordash. Get breakfast, lunch, dinner and more delivered from your favorite restaurants right to your doorstep with one easy click. Get $5 off your first order of $15 or more when you download the DoorDash app and enter promo code SAVAGE. ThredUP is the world’s largest online thrift store with over 35,000 brands at up to 90% off retail price. For a limited time, get up to 30% off your first order at .

53 MIN1 d ago
Comments
Monogamy is looking pretty good!

Paging Dr. Bummer...

EThis week, Dan's guest is epidemiologist Daniel Westreich, who spells out the concept of physical distancing, and why sexual intimacy is going to be pretty difficult to attain for many of us. Some of the conversation is on the Micro, and all of it is on the Magnum. A man asks if virtual reality porn makes sense to help "spice up your sex life." Why yes, it makes A LOT of sense right now. A woman who is engaged to be married to her boyfriend has a female friend. This friend made a drunken, predatory pass at her. Can/should she forgive and try to salvage the friendship? And, saddle up for this weird ride: A man is married to his wife. Cool, cool. They have an open relationship. No prob. She has a boyfriend. Nice. She lives with her boyfriend. Ok? He is not allowed to seek outside partners. Wait- what? Also, his wife's boyfriend forbids her from having sex with the caller, her husband. Soooooo. The caller needs a little chat from Dan Savage. Ring ring! 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelove...

48 MIN1 w ago
Comments
Paging Dr. Bummer...

Will You Be My Quarantine?

EHere at Savage Lovecast world headquarters, in the heart of the epicenter of the Big Sick, we are keeping calm and carrying on, baby! Dan chats with Dr. Jen Gunter, who had to practice social distancing for ONE YEAR, so quit griping. She offers some strategies for how to deal with your new isolation. And, Dr.Debby Herbenick explains that although the corona virus is not sexually transmitted, you still can't just be mashing with anyone safely these days. Uh doy! Hear the tale of Maya, stuck in Spain and wondering if her relationship is mature enough to endure the rigors of quarantine. And, taking a breather, (as it were) from all this virus talk, Dan speaks with Brian Earp, author of Love Drugs: The Chemical Future of Relationships. The tech-savvy at-risk youth are poised to accept this chemical future. 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com This episode of the Savage love cast is brought to you by Everlane: Luxury basic clothing and accessories, made at ethical factories without ...

61 MIN2 w ago
Comments
Will You Be My Quarantine?

What about the gay penguins?

ESometimes people call us when they're drunk. Sometimes they call us about their dogs. Welcome to the center of this Venn diagram. A woman has been invited to a "costume wedding." She will be required to dress up like a character in a movie. Is this asking too much? On the Magnum version of the show, it's a super-weird "What You Got?" with an evolutionary reproductive biologist who mulls over the *possibility* that the animal kingdom is teeming with same-sex behavior. Not just the homo penguins. And, a young woman is turned on by much older men. How can she score a silver fox without looking like gold digger? 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com Thanks to Roman for supporting Savage Lovecast. Roman is a men’s health company that offers remote online diagnosis for ED and convenient monthly delivery of medication. For a free online, visit This episode is brought to you by Doordash. Get breakfast, lunch, dinner and more delivered from your favorite restaurants right to your doorst...

47 MIN3 w ago
Comments
What about the gay penguins?

With Cameron Esposito!

EA gay man was hooking up at a bathhouse. His brand new lover wanted to bring a little romance into the encounter by saying the caller's name and complimenting him. The caller was horrified. Isn't bathhouse sex supposed to be anonymous? Meanwhile, in another corner of our universe, a woman is appalled that her boyfriend closes his eyes when they're having sex. How can she get him to gaze deeply into her soul while pounding her real good? On the Magnum version of the show, Dan chats with stand-up comedian, and podcaster Cameron Esposito about her new book: Save Yourself, and how queerness and the experience of being closeted impacts her comedy. Finally, a married man with a one year-old child bemoans the quality of the "service sex" he's getting these days. With he ever see the return of enthusiastic rutting? 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at and if you want to buy i...

46 MINMAR. 3
Comments
With Cameron Esposito!

All about WEED with Lester Black.

EA straight man was dating a woman, and it felt great. Until she gave him the "I'm not ready for a relationship" line. Is this always a lie? What does it mean? Dan spells it out, with no sugar on top. A man is worried about his new girlfriend. You see, she has never had penetrative sex. Is he special enough to be her first? On the Micro and more on the Magnum, Dan chats with weed journalist (now there's a sweet job if ever we've heard of one,) Lester Black. They talk about a woman whose smart husband turns into a drooling dullard whilst blazed, smoking when you're pregnant, and the effects of marijuana on dick size. Can you resist this show? No, you cannot. A man on the frozen tundra hasn't had sex in 3 years because he claims to be a grower, not a shower. Women reject him because of his dick size (he thinks) and then reject him further when he fails to eat them out properly. But he wants to learn! He asks his female friends if he can practice on them, but strangely, they all say "no...

50 MINFEB. 25
Comments
All about WEED with Lester Black.

The TRUTH about women's libido with Dr. Wednesday Martin.

EA man is going through a divorce from his wife of 7 years. Although their breakup was peaceful, now her communication is curt and unfriendly. Is he entitled to feel angry about her unwarranted coldness? A man kindly lent a friend some money. Now she keeps asking him for more and more every month! Should he just set her up with a regular payment, or cut off the friendship? On the Micro and the Magnum version of the show, Dan chats with Dr. Wednesday Martin, author of Untrue, about women's libido, how it really works, and how our culture's misunderstanding harms relationships. A group of folks were disparaging "outie vaginas" at a party. One of the women there got awfully quiet. Did they offend her? Is this the equivalent of making fun of itsy-bitsy, teeny-tiny penises? 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com This episode is brought to you by Talkspace- online therapy that makes it easy to get extra mental health support. For $100 off your first month, go to and use the offer code S...

51 MINFEB. 18
Comments
The TRUTH about women's libido with Dr. Wednesday Martin.

Spanking is for grownups. With Jillian Keenan.

EA young man has been dating a woman for a short time. She seems great...except. Except she is anti-abortion, and anti-gay in a lazy, not very heartfelt sort of way. Can he use his sex powers to change her feeble mind? Meanwhile, a woman is dating a guy also for a short time. He told her that if he got her pregnant, he would insist that she keep the child instead of have an abortion. Should she, maybe, dump him immediately? On the Magnum, Dan chats with the writer Jillian Keenan about spanking: It's for grown-ups only please. They discuss the origins of a spanking fetish and whether corporal punishment as a child seeps into an adult's erotic imagination. A married man with a religious upbringing feels shame and guilt about masturbating. His wife contributes to this mindset. His marriage is sexless and even his urologist agrees that he needs to ejaculate already. How can he learn to wank with pride? Shame and guilt. Keeping us in business since 2006. 206-302-2064 or This episode is br...

48 MINFEB. 11
Comments
Spanking is for grownups. With Jillian Keenan.

With the brililant Peggy Orenstein.

EA woman is hoping to find a monogamous partner who is also kinky. But when she puts the word "kinky" in her profile she gets flooded with ridiculous pervs. How can she filter out the clueless horndogs? Hear the very unpleasant tale of a gay couple who venture to an older man's apartment for a hook-up, only to find there were many more men there than promised. Why was this gentleman so dishonest? Aren't older men supposed to be supportive mentors for up and coming young 'mos? On the Magnum, Dan speaks with super-duper smart writer Peggy Orenstein, (author of Girls and Sex) about her new book- Boys and Sex. She and Dan discuss how boys both suffer from and then perpetuate the culture of toxic masculinity. If you have a kid with a penis, you should listen to this one. A man is ordained to marry people through one of those mail-in certificates. His sister has asked him to perform her marriage ceremony. But her fiancé is a lying, coke addled, no-good drunk! How can he bless this mess? 2...

46 MINFEB. 4
Comments
With the brililant Peggy Orenstein.

Happy poly homes with Dr. Elisabeth Sheff.

EHave you ever experienced conflict during a family vacation? The first call on this show might put it all in perspective for you. A protective big sister can't stand that her 17 year-old sis is dating a 21 year-old man. Their parents don't mind. Should big sister give the guy a chance, or is the age difference unacceptable? On the Magnum, Dan chats with Dr. Elizabeth Sheff from Psychology Today about raising children within a polyamorous household. And finally, a woman is considering becoming a fin-dom, with the power to financially ruin her client. But she doesn't want to ruin anyone. Is there a way to ethically do this? 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com The Savage Lovecast is brought to you by Dame Products: a woman-founded sex toy company. Visit to check out Eva- the hands-free vibrator. Today’s Lovecast is brought to you by MeUndies.com: High quality, super-comfortable, good looking undies. Get 15% off your first order when you go to . This episode is brought to you by ...

51 MINENE. 28
Comments
Happy poly homes with Dr. Elisabeth Sheff.
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